Small Steps Toward Stupid

There is a blog that I’ve been reading lately that had a good post today about taking small steps toward stupid. The guy talks about some things in his life that may not seem like big deals now … but they are small steps that will  inevitably lead to a big crash down the road.

I have a huge problem with this and his post really made me think. I equate his “small steps toward stupid” idea to what I learned to call “triggers”. Triggers in my life are things that might not mean much to anyone else, but for me they are things that trigger thoughts of the past or thoughts of habits that I’m better off not thinking – because I will eventually end up doing.

For example … music. The music that I listen to on any given day plays a huge role in my mood and mindset. When I’m feeling a certain way I’m drawn to certain music. There are times when I can get sucked into the music and set myself on a path of negative thinking, self-pity, and unavoidable depression.

I can do the same thing with movies. There are nights that I will purposely rent horribly sad movies and watch them over and over again … manufacturing a mood that I want to be in, however, it’s a mood that I should be avoiding at all costs.  Why would anyone want to be sad? For me, it’s a comfortable place, a place where I excuse my behavior, a place where I can more easily shirk responsibility, and a place where I can live in self-pity without feeling so guilty.

My house has a wet bar in the living room. I have conveniently transformed it into a little computer station for myself. I use the built in wine rack to hold shoes and the sink is covered with a piece of wood that holds my printer. One night last week I was cleaning out one of the cabinets and way in the back there was a space where an airplane-sized bottle of Canadian Whiskey had fallen. The previous owners left it behind and without my knowledge it has been nesting itself there just waiting for me to find it for the past two years. Well I finally found it. TRIGGER!!!

About 11 years ago there would have been no question what to do with it. I would have gulped it down without even thinking. But last week it presented somewhat of a dilemma. I threw it away immediately. But funny, looking back, I threw it away right there where I found it. Not out in the dumpster where I couldn’t get it out. No, I just placed it carefully in the trash can within reach.

That was the first small step toward stupid. I won’t go into all the details, but it was a long night. I didn’t think about the bottle really … but I was in such a funk. While lying in bed hours later I remembered the bottle. I thought that I should probably go throw it out for good … but told myself to just wait until morning. Second small step toward stupid.

I tossed and turned all night. Good and bad memories flooding my mind. Good and bad thoughts flooding my mind. Thoughts of what that one little bottle could do to my life … on and on my mind raced.

Thankfully … I fell asleep … the thoughts relented … I threw the bottle away for real … and went on with my day. One huge step toward serenity. Thank God He allowed me to get back on the path I need to be on. Every time I start on the path toward stupid I run a risk of following it all the way to the end. That’s why it’s so important not to get on that road in the first place.

Proverbs 1:15 says when dealing with enticements … “my son, do not set foot on their paths” … steer clear completely because it may be a lot harder to turn around than you expect.

Taken any small steps toward stupid lately? Or better yet, have you taken any huge steps toward serenity?